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Light the shadows
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
7:55 pm

I have my crazy days like this.

Friday, February 22, 2008
11:23 pm
On a losing streak. BREAK OUT OF IT! Better play, better play... ...!!

Friday, February 15, 2008
10:30 pm
CNY holiday was really good. Although much of the time was spent sitting around, watching TV or watching the little kids and getting their attention, it was a good break. The cousins went bowling on the 2nd night. And I have this announcement to make, I had a score of 108! First time I hit above 100. Hehe. =) We watched a midnight movie and went ice-skating over the next two days too. I conclude that ice-skating isn't that fun and it's super expensive! Roller blading is probably much better.

But now it's back to reality again. The piles of homework, the piles of this and the piles of that and it doesn't help that I'm constantly worrying and thinking about something.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008
11:01 pm
CNY is just 2 days away. I am totally not in the mood yet despite seeing the decorations around and hearing CNY songs. I wonder if we get less and less of the festivity mood as we grow older until one day we have to do the preparations all be ourselves. New year clothes buys have dropped this year too. I don't have a single new bottom to wear. Don't know how I am going to survive new year. Oh well, but still HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR everyone!

Friday, February 01, 2008
10:38 pm
It's really hard to tell yourself to keep going when you are not improving. I don't want to give up but I don't know how to psycho myself to be happy all the time. I really wonder if anyone can be so strong, I wonder if Mr Tay has ever had his dark days. I've been going downhill since long long ago. The improvements are never all-round or sustainable. The most demoralising of all would be spiking. There's so many things to consider and think about in that one split second. And when Mr Tay means well and tries to encourage me, I think I sink even further inside. I really tried to tell myself to jump higher today but I couldn't do it still. Maybe I lost the concentration, or got lost in my own thoughts. AHHH! I have to urge to scream out loud but I have no where to do that. SAVE ME! Let the next training or next time I'm going to touch the volleyball be better. It's time to go back up, I have been down for too long. I can do it! I just have to relax and build up the confidence in me. Put my best effort in and use all the strength I have at that point of time. Someone please give me the strength to carry on!

Anyway, I feel super exhausted these days. I'm not exactly super sleepy all the time that I crave to sleep, neither am I exactly tired physically as in like no real muscle aches or anything, except when I have to squat to receive balls. I even felt like crumbling down on Wednesday. I think I just need a day when I finally have nothing to do. All homework done, no volleyball, no committments, nothing to think or worry about. I worry too much these days. Everyday on my way home I will feel damn stressed over the work I have to do but the limited time I have. I will go crazy at this rate. I'm still not used to this tutorial and lecture thing. We have to do and read ahead so it's like never ending. And then I worry about whether I can survive GP and Econs. Sigh...

Mr Yong won't be teaching us anymore. Sad. I started out not liking him. But after that first lesson, he's like totally okay and in fact good. Oh well...

Mr Tay just made a great discovery! There are 60 student members in the volleyball team! WOW. We really have grown A LOT.


Yi Xian
Zhi Xin
Zhuo Wen

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